Friday and breezy. A perfect end to an okay week.
I'm driving through the high school parking lot, windows down.
I pass by a car with its windows down too.
I haven't cut him off; I haven't slowed him down in any way.
No provoking.
He turns to me.
Yells ching chong noises and laughs.
I'm so shocked I can't even react.
For about 30 seconds I want to put my car in park...get out...and beat up this random high school bully.
Then, "Student Teacher Assaults Local Boy" details at 9, flashes through my thoughts.
Obviously an assault would be less than ideal.
And so I just keep driving. Keep driving along.
Then it really hits me. This raw, raw anger and hurt.
It's been at least four or five years since someone has yelled fucked up shit to my face.
Four or five years since I've had to deal with unprovokedignorantbelligeranthatespeech.
Four or five years since I shed my thick skin and left bullshit high school for more discreet forms of hate.
Four or five years since someone could make me feel like I'm back in 1st grade again, trying to defend myself unarmed, my words failing me completely.
And then I cried.
2 comments:
I just wanted to remark that this blog is important. It provides a space to create a collective memory and experience for all who read it. It also provides a platform for those who write to be visible, taken seriously, and supported. Thanks bloggers!
I love you and I wish I could make the hurt go away! :(
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